“Before February ends, a miracle will happen.”
“Before February ends, a miracle will happen.”
It has been a while to say the least.
I invested some time in what some would call, a spiritual vacation of the mind, body, and soul. In other words, I truly invested some blood, sweat and tears towards creating a happier, truly more peaceful version of myself. While I am still in the works of finding that permanent serenity, this whole peaceful vacation began when my phone broke, which was a blessing in disguise. I took this upon myself to recognize that there was a certain, almost disgustingly addictive, silence and freedom that came from a break from my virtual reality.
I took a break from socializing virtually, and really attempted to find some focus, happiness, stability and consistency within my concrete life. The beautiful part of this decision to part from my social media was that so much beauty came from this spiritual vacation, including a break from constantly needing to be concerned, be worried, or feel a constant pressure from social media. I truly had to a chance to be present and make this time away from technology a great time for myself.
To go on, I did not replace my phone for about three months. I truly took a vacation of my own, however, I was able to invest myself in so many other more meaningful lights that I am almost certain that if I had no gone through with this virtual vacation, things would not have turned out so great for me. This is probably because social media takes up a lot more time and is somewhat utilized as a tool in my life. I learned how unimportant social media was, but also how powerful it still is in our society, through my break from technology. A break from this world was exactly what came to me, whether I was ready to accept it or not.
I focused on REAL self-care, not just a virtual perception of self-care. I engaged in daily cardio, which my soul needed. I began picking up legitimate responsibilities in many facets of my life, and I also focused on truly making attempts to make things, and certain circumstances, better for myself, rather than just accepting mediocre standards of life. I craved more sensibility and found comfort with myself much more, which I found has been difficult, during many times of my life.
I forced myself to make commitments, and while I am still nervous about the idea of commitments to anything, I am making efforts towards attempting to accept commitments.
While so much good has come out of this time away from distractions, many days can often be difficult, tiring and still stressful for me. I have had to put in a lot of hard work, in order to receive my hard work back in many mysterious ways, but I am thankful nonetheless
In contrast to all this good news, I also reconfirmed that I am lactose intolerant. While I will not divulge too much about it now, I will be the first to let you know that making lifestyle changes, such as cutting dairy out of my daily diet, has served as difficult, as well as caused me much discomfort and bloating. I have found my stomach to be much more sensitive than I would like it to be, which has truly forced me to make changes in more ways than one.
I still love coffee, hiking, photography, social media, shopping, my loved ones, and dogs, however, I am very proud of myself and have made some newsworthy growth.
With that said, a rut and a vacation is sometimes all we need to find some god-forsaken happiness.
I still love creating, sharing, and blogging, and am hoping to invest more time and effort to creating some incredible content for this upcoming year!
Good things are coming this year! I hope the same for all.
I hope everyone has an wonderful day!
The month of June has been extremely exciting, frustrating, stressful, kind, postive, and incredible all at the same time. It is safe to say that is has been a very emotional month for me, full of more incredible memories than bad memories.
I am still continuing to learn, grow, and mature, as the days come to me. I am still making mistakes, though…I am still a human being, and unfortunately, I make plenty of mistakes.
But, what can I say? I am still young and still have a handful of mistakes to continue making.
This month was a month full of growth, re-discovery, discovery, panic, anger, happiness, emotions, and self-awareness.
The stress and the heat of the Summer was beginning to get to me by the middle of the month, as I realized that time was continuing to fly, with or without my consent. As a result, all the things that I had continued to procrastinate still were left undone and unresolved, leaving me in a state of panic.
At the same time that the stress was hitting me, my urge to spend every waking minute outside, playing and enjoying the Sun, began emerging, with or without my consent. I found myself constantly wanting to enjoy my days, doing only things that I wanted to, not necessarily the things that I had to do, which only intensified my stress, as I often ended up choosing to enjoy my life.
I spent a lot of time this month focusing on having fun, or engaging in fun activities that I have always wanted to do, instead of constantly punishing myself for not working hard enough.
I can say with affirmation that I was much kinder to myself this month than I have been in a few years.
I am not ashamed to say that I do not regret any ounce of fun that I engaged in over the course of the last month, and I would not ever take it back.
I spent a lot more time outside, hanging out with friends, doing activities that I love, and learning to relax.
It was much more difficult than one would imagine.
Re-learning to relax, or to let myself relax and breathe, was extremely difficult.
In your head, it is quite simple, as breathing is one of those innate skills that should not take much energy, or stress, to execute. Unforunately, I completely forgot how to execute relaxing and breathing recently, and re-learning to do something that I have not practiced in a while was difficult.
I am extremely proud of myself for allowing myself to get out of my own head, and finally allowing myself to forgive, to forget, and to just be.
My mind has been working extremely hard recently to hold me captive inside my thoughts, and it seemed like lately my head was the only place that I could reside in.
It seemed like most times I was unable to seperate myself from the capitivity of my head and my thoughts, which often made it extremely difficult for me to simply just enjoy the moments passing by and impeded my ability to have fun.
My prison sentence in the nearest federal brain prison has finally come to an end, and boy, am I glad that it is slowly coming to a stop.
This month, after finally learning to live outside of my brain, I was able to push myself outside of my comfort zone, as I stopped using my anxiety as a valid excuse for everything. Living outside of my head has truly helped me manage my anxiety and panic attacks to a certain extent.
While I still experienced some painful panic attacks, racing thoughts, etc., I have seen progress within my growth. I have been experimenting with various new coping mechanisms, in order to experience blissful states.
I never realized how much my own brain, my own thoughts, and my own irrational fears could take control of my life. Your brain is truly a powerful muscle!
I have been doing my best to take advantage of this new success that I have achieved by attempting to continue to grow and to continue becoming a better person every chance that I can.
Another thing that I have been working hard to do is to SLOW DOWN, in every way, shape, and form. My mind became overtly cluttered and chlosterphobic when I was unable to simply allow myself some time to slow down. When my mind is working faster than I am able to process my thoughts, my obligations, my anxieties, or my fears, I begin to immediately panic and begin feeling like I am drowning in my own thoughts, without a life vest.
Slowing down allows me to simply break down fears, obligations, stresses, etc., without exxassperating an already uncomfortable situation.
Entering every day with a strong and calm mindset is not something that can simply be done. It takes a lifetime of practice, as life is incredibly stressful.
My mind loves to wander, so it is especially important that I keep her on a short leash. In a matter of milliseconds, my mind can turn a seemingly achievable task into the MOST ENORMOUSLY TALL HURDLE TO EVER COME ACROSS. My mind also can turn into a torture chamber in a blink of an eye. As a result, I have made it an utmost priority to work on training myself on catching myself before I let my mind do such unspeakable things. These are all things that can be improved and helped, which is something that I continue to remind myself.
Be kind to yourself and enjoy the beautiful life you live.
Learning to love yourself and be kind to yourself can be as simple as to stop saying that “you can’t” do something, or be better.
I am the most forgetful person when it comes to being kind to myself and learning to let myself enjoy life.
No matter what you have done, or what you are going to do, you deserve to be happy, to enjoy your life, and to have fun! You deserve to laugh and you deserve to feel good about yourself. Try to enjoy, or even celebrate, your existence and your happiness. Share it with the world!
The world, including yourself, spends too much time and effort punishing you and trying to bring you down anyways. So, you may as well enjoy as much of it celebrating and DOING LIFE, in order to maximize your time on this Earth.
Be the light at the end of the tunnel for yourself and for others.
Happiness, joy, and a love for life is contagious, and it will be the only thing I will be catching this year.
Wisconsin, Wisconsin, Wisconsin…
I truly did not know exactly what the state of Wisconsin was going to be like, let along what it was going to look like.
I imagined Wisconsin to be completely different than what it turned out to be, and boy, am I glad that my imagination downplayed the beauty of Wisconsin, because I was SHOCKED at how beautiful it was once I had arrived.
Wisconsin is an oasis, with lakes at every exit of the highway!
There was a surplus of lakes and lush greenery, and it was truly breathtaking.
Summers in Wisconsin are the definition of bliss.
The scenery within the state of Wisconsin is stunning! I would have to agree that it is truly the best in the Midwest.
Being so close to any water, whether it be a lake, river, etc., is a concept that is completely unfamiliar to me, as I grew up in the landlocked state of Colorado. I never grew up around water, so playing by and playing on the water was something that was extremely exciting for me.
While “lake life” in Wisconsin can not be beat, neither can the sunsets.
During my short-but-sweet stay in Wisconsin, I saw a handful of breathtaking sunsets that literally had my jaw all the way to the floor.
Most of my time was spent in Occonomowac, Wisconsin on Lac La Belle, and watching the sunsets from the lake was one of the most incredible things I have witnessed!
I even had multiple opportunities to watch the fireworks of the lake, which was another gorgeous site and one that should not have been missed!
Due to the fireban that extends throughout Colorado, I will not be able to experience an AMAZING firework show, and normally, do not get the opportunity to watch them.
Every night, there always seemed to be at least one firework show happening in the distance. I finally got to see a REAL FIREWORK SHOW at least once a day.
I clearly had no idea what I was missing out on!
Lac La Belle was gorgeous, if you could not already tell, and a great place to cool off for the Summer.
I spent A SURPLUS of time in the lake, as this was my first time spending significant amounts of time by the water.
My irrational fear of deep water, even though I can swim and participated in swim team, subsided, as the calm and serenity of the lake overtook my irrational fear.
I spent as many hours as possible swimming in the lake, tanning by the lake, tanning on the water, jet skiing, on boat rides, and even paddle boarding.
These are all activities that I cannot normally do in Boulder, Colorado, so I found them especially exciting.
I also finally got to wear and use my numerous bathing suits for reasons other than tanning, or not actually going in the water. Some of my bathing suits saw more action than they have in years, and their entire existence!
It took 23 years for me to finally get to know the water on a more deeper level, but I definitely do not regret it for a second.
Lake culture is super exciting and it was a pleasure getting to know all the rules of the lake. Ironically, or not so ironically, the number one rule of the lake is the golden rule, which is treat people how you want to be treated.
People were extremely friendly on the lake, if that was any consolation that the world still does have good, friendly people around.
The toys that people had for the lake were GREAT, and so much fun to play with. I had never seen so many paddle boards, jet skies, boats, floaties of all shapes, sizes, and species, etc. I just wanted to play with them all!
The most challenging part of the trip was making sure to allocate my time appropriately, so I could get acquainted with every lake toy that I had access to.
To say that I had fun is an understatement, because this one of my favorite trips that I have ever been on in a while! I honestly did not expect to have this fun, or rather did not know that I could have this much fun!!
I was a little bit out of my comfort zone, however, that was exactly what I was looking for.
Wisconsin allowed me the power to mentally, emotionally, and physically take a vacation from my current reality in Boulder, Colorado, which had been stressing me out.
My goal of my vacation time in Wisconsin was simply to leave my worries, anxieties, and circumstances at home, and do exactly what one is to do on vacation, which is to relax, have fun, and to forget that you have any worries.
It will forever hold a special place in my heart and I will never forget it.
I am looking for some more vacations to Wisconsin, especially in the Summer and by any lake for that matter!
My favorite part about Wisconsin, minus the beautiful scenery and landscape and the lake, was the custard that could be found everywhere! Growing up in Boulder, I did not get to indulge in much custard, but Wisconsin allows ample opportunities to get a taste of the good life.
Wisconsin has a certain kind of beauty and charm that captivated me and made me fall in love with the state!
Who would have thought that admist all the corn fields and flat horizons of the Midwest that it would contain such a beautiful place? I most certainly did not.
Wisconsin, your lakes, your beaches, your forestry, your sunsets and your custard will most certainly be missed!
I already miss waking up to a view of the blue waters of the lake.
I will be back to Wisconsin very soon, but I had to leave because the mountains (my job) were calling me back.
I would call Wisconsin a Summer’s paradise, and I would consider one of my favorite places to spend my Summers.
Where do you enjoy spending your Summers?
Monday, June 25, 2018, marks the first day of a very eventful and highly anticipated road trip. I will be making the journey from Boulder, Colorado to Milwaukee, Wisconsin with one of my dearest friends, Bria Schlossmann.
While our main mission is to drive her Jeep back to Milwaukee, we decided to use it as an excuse to spend time together, adventure, and finally execute a trip that we had always entertained for five years. This year it finally became a reality!
Bria is from Wisconsin, however, I am a Boulder native, who has left the Boulder bubble, but not enough. I figured if I could figure out arraignments for my obligations that I could experience the world just a little more. The world contains so many magical, all natural gifts and treasures that are begging to be recognized, admired, uncovered, and shared.
Our first day was quite eventful, as we crossed the Colorado border into Nebraska.
We also made a pit stop at Fort Morgan, Colorado. Fort Morgan is a fairly small farm town and it seemed fairly traditional! There is something about those small towns that are charming, because they contain their own local gems that give the town a personality.
Of course, as we were leaving Colorado and entering Nebraska, we could not help but grab a picture at the “Welcome to Colorful Colorado.” This ended up being a little more of an obstacle for us, as I forced Bria to get off at the nearest exit and go in the opposite direction that we were supposed to be driving in JUST TO GET THIS PICTURE.
We did not skip a beat, proceeding to grab pictures at the “Welcome to Nebraska” sign, just because we can.
Staring at endless fields of corn, wheat, grass, etc. has always been fairly soothing for me to look at. Man, these fields sure do make the Earth seem like it could possibly be flat, but only part-time. The landscape is beautiful in its own unique way, and truly depends on perspective. Colorado and Nebraska had a surplus of endless fields, and luckily these fields looked far from dry, but very green and lush! This made me very happy and grateful for the rain that our nation has been receiving.
The sky was what was up!! The clouds were so breathtaking to look at, as they seemed to be just as endless as the fields, as you could see them for miles. The clouds also seemed friendlier than usual, appearing to hang lower and closer to the ground than normal. The sky was captivating to be around
On our second day, we made our way through Nebraska, Iowa, Illinois, and finally made it to Wisconsin.
The entire time we found ourselves chasing a storm, and at some points, the rain was so heavy that we could not see the roads.
I saw lots of wind farms….
and lots of beauty!
I also found a new appreciation for the sky and the clouds.
My two day road trip excursion was extremely exciting, full of laughs, good memories, and good conversation.
My vacation is only beginning, however. I will be spending some time with Bria and her family in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, as well as Elk Point, Wisconsin. I am looking forward to be spending time with them, and exploring Wisconsin in all of its’ glory.
What Summer trips do you have planned?
Drive safe, but trip road often!!
On June 22, 2018, two of my coworkers, plus their dogs, and I made our way up to the mountains, in order to engage in some all natural therapy for several days.
Camping in the Summer is an activity that is supremely popular in Colorado, so we decided to jump on the bangwagon and get campin’.
I have not been camping in a little bit, so this camping trip served as an excellent way to dip my toes back in the water.
As a kid, my parents took my brother and I camping pretty regularly. But, as I grew older, the camping trips became much more of a rare occassion.
Throughout my high school and collegiate careers, I went camping at least once or twice a year, but still it did not compare to the number of camping trips that I went on as a child. Plus, these camping trips tended to get more *wild,* as they were unsupervised, only consisting of a group of high school-aged kids, or college kids, who did everything but be responsible.
Let us just say that those camping trips consisted of a surplus of low-grade vodka, usually Burnetts, UV, or McCormicks, and a bunch of 30-racks of Rolling Rock or Natty Ice.
But, what better place to celebrate being reckless, or engage in underage drinking, than in the wild, with views that extend 360 degrees? Might as well be irresponsible, in nature, where the views are endless and breathtaking. Plus, the sudden rise in elevation guaranteed that at least one person would end up either peeing themselves, “blacked out,” or passed out somewhere in the woods, or in someone’s car.
This camping trip was the first one of the Summer! My friends, their dogs, and myself made our way to Peaceful Valley, Colorado, to a campsite named “Camp Dick.” The campsite was completely full and occupied with eager campers and families.
Our campsite was located in the middle of Camp Dick, so we had some pretty great views! The campsite was located in a valley that was completely covered in green, lush trees, almost making it seem as if we were in a forest!
While Sunday, June, 24, was a fairly cloudy and rainy day, Friday and Saturday were some of the sunniest and warmest days ever! Even in the middle of the mountains, where the temperatures are supposedly cooler than in Boulder, Colorado, I found myself sweating and complaining about being “too hot,” or “way too warm.”
Camp Dick had a lot more to offer than we even expected, including a beautiful creek, or river, that ran through the entire campsite! Beyond the creek, one could find infinite amounts of trees and forestry until the eye could extend.
It was incredibly calming to be completely surrounded by nature, or to be isolated from “the real world.” The sounds of nature and the simplicity of nature serve as some of my most favorite anti-anxiety agents!
The main source of entertainment, minus spending time in nature, attempting to start a camp fire, and making friends with 5-years-olds, was definitely the dogs that decided to accompany us on our trip!
My coworkers have own of the cutest dogs, or best friends, ever!!
Seeing them in the wild, or in their element outside of doggy day care, was extremely comical and AWESOME.
This weekend solidified my place as reigning godmother to both of these beautiful, eccentric dogs who continue to fill my life with love, happiness, and barking.
Harlee Jo, a red heeler australian cattle dog puppy, is currently five months old, and is one of my favorite playmates ever! She is the definition of a puppy and still does have a lot to learn, however, she is the most fun puppy ever known to man! Not to mention, she is one of the most unique and breathtaking puppies I have ever set eyes on. Harlee is seriously one of the prettiest cattle dogs that I have ever layed eyes on and I am completely obsessed with her. There is never a dull moment with Harlee Jo!
Minnie, a chiwuini, is a little over one-years-old, but do not let her extremely small body fool you! She has the biggest personality ever known to man and a very expressive soul, existence, and face! Minnie resembles a character from a Disney/Pixar movie, and I think that she is so incredibly animated. She is one of the most loving and sassy girls I know!
How have you been spending your Summer nights? Have you gone camping this summer?