Life Hack #30 – S/O To My Squad

Celebrate and shout out your fellow cheerleaders, or your support system, and do this regularly! You can never celebrate and uplift your personal cheer squad too much, as their existence in your life deserves infinite amounts of celebratory praise and appreciation. The more that you continue to acknowledge and to truly appreciate the positivity that their existence brings to your life, the more love and the more growth that friendship will begin to experience. Similarly, the more love and the more appreciation you begin to show the members of your personal cheerleading squad, the more that this individual will begin to shine and the more that this individual will begin actively exuding their best qualities, whether you notice this or not.

Everything about displaying appreciation for your support system presents positive benefits, even if these benefits may not be clearly visible for you to see.
Individuals tend to exude their best qualities and be the best versions of themselves when they are presented with positive, kind reminders of the great things that they bring to the table. In short, individuals tend to react much more positive to positive reinforcement, which can come in the form of compliments, daily reminders, etc., than they react to negativity. This is self explanatory, as human beings are programmed to respond and react in a more positive way when they are offered incentives, such as compliments, gifts, etc.

While it is nearly impossible to actively address every single one of your personal cheerleading squad with appreciation every day, however, it is incredibly important to enforce acts of appreciation for your support system, at least once a week. Tending to your support system is similar to tending to a garden; if you do not water the plants in your garden regularly, or proceed to take care of this garden, the plants in your garden will slowly begin decaying. If you continue to neglect taking care of your garden, it will result in a garden full of feeble, weak, unstable, rickety, and fragile decayed plants, which are far from accountable, let along desireable. Further neglegance over the care of your garden will result in a environment full of weeds, which will only further complicates your life by adding unnecessary clutter that you do not even want to deal with. The goal of a garden is to create an oasis, in which all of the plants are happy, healthy, strong, and stable, which are all adjectives that should describe the members of your support system. Just like your garden, you want your support system to consist of accountable, hearty, and unwavering individuals, as a strong and capable support system allows for the best opportunity for an individual to flourish and to blossom.

The foundation of one’s success rate begins with their support system, or their personal cheerleading squad. The stronger the foundation, the more stable and powerful the support system is.

A support system does not come together in the blink an eye. In fact, casting cheerleaders for your personal squad can take years and try-outs are held numerous times a month, sometimes a day. Try-outs are relentless and you will come across many desireable members for your squad, however, not every member that you cast will end up sticking around. Some cheerleaders that have made the cut for your squad initially may possess the skills and the foundation to be an excellent member of your squad, however, not every individual has the ability to mesh well with your cheerleading squad. As a result of extensive the selection process that goes into the casting process of your permanent cheerleading squad, you will encounter many temporary members, who may cheer for your team only for a short amount of time. This means that you will often find many individuals to quit the cheerleading squad, only supporting you for a temporary amount of time. These individuals are not necessarily “bad,” however, it just means that this individual just may not be the best fit for your cheerleading squad. As a result, their long-term participation on your cheerleading squad is simply out of the question. Some members of your cheerleading squad may serve shorter sentences than others who may hold a more permanent place within your cheerleading squad.

We are always changing, as our lives, so it is only natural that only a small percentage of the potential squad members are able to make the squad every try-out, as the nature, essence, goals, and priorities of the cheerleading squad is constantly changing. The permanent place-holding cheerleaders possess the qualities, patience, acceptance, and attitude to conform, and furthermore, support the cheerleading squad with their utmost ability. Not every cheerleader will possess the skills to successfully mold into the needs of the cheerleading squad, all while providing other benefits to the cheerleading squad that help the squad grow, succeed, fail, struggle, and fight. The ones that possess the love, patience, acceptance and support to hold a permanent place on your cheerleading squad time and time again are the individuals that you should never forget to shower with love, compliments, kindness, compassion, joy, and support. These people that constantly drag their booties to every life event and stand on the sidelines constantly rooting for you to succeed and to win are a rare breed, and should always be kept close to your heart.

Just like your cheerleading is constantly looking out for your best interest, it is important that you reciprocate the favor, by also tending to their needs, wants, and their best interests. After all, you do want your squad at their best, mentally, physically and emotionally.

I guarantee that all the members of your personal cheerleading squad will personally appreciate it, as it is not only polite and kind to treat people as they treat you. People will begin to lose motivation to actively work their bodies to ground for someone who either fails to acknowledge or appreciate all the good that you are doing for them. Within every functional relationship, the idea of a two-way street is always evident. It does feel nice to be recognized for your kind deeds and honest intentions, even though kindness and honest intentions do not require acknowledgement.

It is very important to get to know your personal fan-base. You should seek to form relationships with each and every member of your current squad, as knowledge serves to be a beneficial facet of building the most successful squad for your current reality. By forming personal and intimate relationships with every member of the squad, you can identify strengths and weaknesses, personalities, etc. within your squad. With this information, you can further work to mold your dream squad to showcase their utmost strengths.

Intimacy within a team of any kind functions at its’ most effective pace when members are motivated to work together. A motivation to work together sprouts from knowing, and therefore, trusting the people that have your back. It is safe to conclude that one’s ability to actively and effectively work with others closely is an important aspect in concluding whether or not they are fit to be apart of your squad. Members of your dream team should feel comfortable working with other members of your cheer squad to further benefit you, or otherwise solidify their support system.

It is much easier and comfortable living your life, knowing that you have an entire cheerleading squad behind you, rooting for you and supporting you, in sickness and in health. While it is fundamental to find support within yourself, individuals tend to experience more successful outcomes when they have a strong support system that is willing to work with you, and all your unique needs, wants, comfortability, strengths, weaknesses and your personality and behaviors, to develop a unique, effective cheer routine that caters to your unique existence, your current priorities, needs, and wants, in order to execute the routine in the most successful and most accurate way that they are able to, in order to make you happy, support you, and bring you success and happiness.

You should treat the members of your hard-working cheer squad like they are your family. Your cheerleading squad does not always have to include members of your family, however, it is important to recognize that your cheer squad is your non-biological family. They are very important forces in your well-being, happiness, etc.

No amount of reciprocation of kindness is ever too much. Throwing a themed party to celebrate and appreciate all the members of your metaphoric backbone, or spine, should be mandatory for all individuals, as we do not celebrate people’s existence nearly enough within our society. Your spinal chord, or your support system, is a very important part of your body, as it holds more responsibilities than the President of America. It is so important to take care of your spinal chord – I would even recommend spoiling your squad, especially the good ones. You know who they are!

Pampering and spoiling those you love is not a crime. Showing someone how much they mean to you speaks louder than words, and you should never take advantage of these permanent members of your cheerleading squad. These permanent place-holders on your squad do more than tolerate your existence. In fact, being apart of someone’s support system, or truly caring for another human being, is a full-time job. Their time is so valuable – do not waste their time and energy failing to acknowledge how much they do for you, whether you notice the good that they bring or not.

The way you choose to express and to celebrate every member of your support system is up to you. The size or the grandiosity of the gesture hardly plays a role in how thankful that individual be with your graceful act of appreciation. A little does go a long way, in this case.

Do not be afraid to celebrate, to enjoy, and to appreciate all the good humans that work very hard to keep you happy, healthy, and strong.

SPOIL YOUR RIDE OR DIE HOMIES. IT IS NOT A CRIME!

xo,

Aichan Tewahade

365 Times Around The Sun

Exactly a year ago, February 6th, 2017, I began a WordPress blog, as this had been one of my goals/dreams for a few years now. After years of procrastination, due to some insecurities, endless amounts of excuses, and a lack of focus and drive, I finally decided to conjure up some courage and stop letting my fears and anxiety get in the way of actually following through with this dream of mine. Yeah, I did not think I would be successful at it, even though deep down inside, I wanted success. I did not think many of my friends or family truly believed that I would follow through with this plan, nor did they truly believe that I was truly going to commit to following through with one of many “awesome ideas that they thought I would be really good at.” I struggle with following through with implementing dreams and goals, and I really was not sure what to expect or if I would actually finally commit to something that I super secretly wanted to be good at and invest time in.
Honestly, even after creating the blog itself, I did not believe anyone would want to, let along, ever read what I had to say. A blog is similar to a journal, it is an open book and you have the freedom to make it your own. Many hours, endless nights, and many hand cramps were involved with my mindless, 13-page rants that were within my journal, as I wrote down my thoughts, opinions, rants, ideas, and whatever else I wanted to write, draw, or insert into my journal. It was a great way for me to relieve some stress and write freely my endless thoughts that not everyone, including myself, could even piece together sometimes. My journal became therapeutic, and slowly but surely, my endless rants, complaints, and my thoughts lead for me to begin writing about life lessons I learned from my day of living, including the good, the bad, the ugly, and the boring. Some days I wrote about myself, other days, I wrote about life advice or life lessons that I had realized from my day. Some days I would just rant incessantly about nonsense. All I know was that I had a lot to say and a lot to share. I have now filled five journals, and while I have fallen out of the habit of journaling daily, I would like to reconnect with this hobby of mine.
Slowly, while I was filling out the last few pages of my very first journal, I came to a conclusion that I would like to start my own blog – why not put my thoughts, my experiences, my life lessons, and my words onto the Internet for those to share? I am not the biggest fan of opening up to people, including my own friends and my own family, in fact, I am quite closed off, especially when it comes to speaking about anything below surface-level. A journal was great, as it is where I find myself being the most honest version of myself, where I was the most capable of expressing myself comfortably, and where I could address my emotions and emotional side of myself (which I do NOT like to do). My journal became my best friend. Yup, I placed more trust in this inanimate object than I did in people, including myself at times. For some reason, I knew that my journal was safe and that I could trust it not to judge me despite what was being written in it. My journal was my trusty mate, someone I could count on whenever or wherever. While a journal is much more personal and something you can keep to yourself, a blog, while similar to a journal in some senses, is much less personal. A blog, which is public for anyone to see, does not allow for the privacy that journals provide. With that said, I took a leap of faith and decided that I had some insight, opinions, thoughts, passions, etc. that I wanted to share with the world. Even if no one would acknowledge my words, I figured “Eh, why not?”
Not having a prompt, or any idea how to create a “brand, or a presence on social media, really made it difficult at first to even produce my first post, which did not come along until days after February 26, 2017, when I finally just did it, like Nike keeps trying to tell me to do.
So, naturally, I began with coming up with a name for my blog. My inspiration for the name of my blog, while I cannot pinpoint the exact moment, came to me while I was mindlessly scrolling through my Tumblr news feed.
The name of my blog needed it to be catchy, but I wanted it to be something unique, something “me,” something that conveyed my values and beliefs, and something that was available for use (a.k.a. a URL name/username that was not already in use). It seemed that any ideas that I had seemed to be falling through, even when I was being “creative” and “thinking outside of the box,” every name for my blog that I wanted to use had already been taken.
Finally, after wracking my brain for hours, I came up with “indulgeyourlife.wordpress.com.” The inspiration behind my blog, is about allowing people into my life, allowing them to indulge in my world honestly. Similarly, the blog’s main message is for others to learn to indulge in their lives, learning to overcome hardships and learning to enjoy life, no matter what adversities one must face. Enjoying life and allowing people into my world, with the hopes of helping, providing hope, providing humor, providing a safe place, and impacting someone positively, is the goal of the blog.
Once I customized the theme of my WordPress, I had to overcome another hurdle – actually blogging and creating a blog post. The blog was inactive for a few days, or even weeks, after I created it. After some time, I finally just bit the bullet and wrote some words down.
“Great, you posted one post…now, what? Where are you going to go with this?”
Don’t worry, I kept procrastinating.
When I began my blog, I truly had nothing else to ruin or to do. I had no choice, but to sit in the smallest studio apartment, in a basement with not much to work with other than myself, my brain, my thoughts, my boredom, my hyper personality, my anxiety, my laziness, and my creativity. I also had access to working limbs that allowed me to type, if only I just STOPPED with the excuses, with the insecurities, I could just do this blogging thing. I had nothing to lose and lots of time to kill. I also have a lot to say, and realize that I often do not think before I speak and struggle with expressing myself verbally clearly and concisely. My mouth gets me in trouble sometimes.
Let me just be real – I do not speak very eloquently via mouth, so why not try to capitalize on my written interpersonal communication skills, which allow me to convey my thoughts, feelings and emotions in the most direct way possible. Blogging, or writing, allows me to think before I speak or act, in this case, I am forced to think before I type up an article and before I post something. This allows me to truly gather all my thoughts together and portray myself in a way that is easy for others to understand.
Blogging seems easy at first, until you realize that a blogger is required to post regularly, create new content daily, create a “brand personality” for yourself, connect with others, be creative, etc. It is a full-time job. So, after months of attempting to succeed at this blogging activity, I finally was able to create what seemed like a legitimate personality, as well as a routine. My brand personality was inspired by my own personality – SHOCKER. I decided to not make things any more difficult for me, capitalize on my strengths and interests, and be honest. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, be yourself.” This actually came in handy, though.
I lost momentum throughout the year, focusing on it when I desired, but after being disappointed by my analytics, I knew the only way to go about taking care of something that I cared for required more than just applying myself whenever I felt like it. I did not want to fail miserably.
I kept reminding myself that with practice and hard-work, you can achieve “perfect.”
So, I implemented a plan to stick with this blog and held myself accountable. This was something I cared about, was passionate about, etc., so just like other things in my life, in order for it to grow and flourish, one must attend and care for its needs. This required a lot of courage and focus for me, as I often find myself insecure about advertising my blog, due to the way others may perceive it. I realized I needed to get over this insecurity of mine, and if people liked it, they liked it. If they did not like it, they did not. I still feel very uneasy at times about this matter.
As my father always reminds me, the quality of your work is not based on likes, neither are you. The key to success is consistency and continuing to be genuine, going above and beyond, and having fun.
Having fun is great and all, except when you are faced with yourself being your biggest critic. Yup, I am a perfectionist, but truly hide this desire to be perfect by acting like I do not care AT ALL. I secretly care TOO MUCH, to the point where I am so stressed that about the idea of rejection as a result of imperfection and not up-keeping a perfect image, that I never follow through with anything. I also tend to replace this regret of being a wuss by acting out of control, in order to alleviate the stress of regret in many ways that hurt all aspects of my life.
Instead of spending time in my head thinking about “how this could be so great for me and so fun,” I decided to be imperfect and present myself as a more genuine form of me.
One of my biggest fears is that people may find grammatical errors within my articles. I get so embarrassed by that.
Today, however, I discovered SOMETHING new – a spell check feature. I wish I would have discovered this a year ago, after endless months of complaining about how annoying it was that WordPress DID NOT have a spell-check feature. Everything has spell-check these days.
Game Changer. 
While I am no social media celebrity, I AM PROUD TO SAY I HAVE REACHED A YEAR OF BLOGGING, 262 POSTS LATER, 2,727 VIEWS LATER, 1,400 VISITORS, 120 WORDPRESS FOLLOWERS LATER, & 1,070 LIKES LATER, I am proud to say that Indulge Your Life has survived one-year, or 365 days, of existence!
Happy first birthday to my beautiful child [my blog]! May my blog’s second year of existence be full of just as many challenges, triumphs, fails, likes, frustrations, excitement, follows, and opportunities than I ever imagined.
I never thought we would make it this far. I cannot believe we are still growing!
Over the course of the last year of wrestling with my blog, this blog has become one the most positive outlets for my emotional and mental stressors, a great way to connect with others, a way to express myself creatively, and it has become therapeutic for me. I may not be able to handle taking care of a baby full-time, however, a blog, I can do that.
I would like to thank those who have taken time out of their day to appreciate, follow, dislike, acknowledge, or even secretly check out my blog! An an even bigger shout out to all the those hiring managers, who I basically forced to read my blog, by inserting in my resume and cover letter, not so discretely. Even if you may have been lying about even taking time to look over it and enjoying it, thank you for putting up with that obnoxious behavior and taking time to acknowledge its existence. The last shout out goes to my friends, who I text, bother and force to “go like my blog post article link that I posted on Facebook.” I do this every single time. I truly would apologize for bringing it up in every instance possible, but I really am not sorry. It is okay that you do not even have time to read the articles, it is the actual fact that you put up with my self-promotion to an extent in which I do not have the patience for. But, most importantly, for those who have kept encouraging me to follow my dreams, supported me, assisted me, and reassured me when I doubted myself, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR GIVING ME THE REASSURANCE TO KEEP MOVING AND DOING WHAT I LOVE.
With that said, I hope that many more amazing opportunities, outcomes and positivity come out of keeping up with this passion of mine. I hope I can share my passions with you!
I do not really have much of an agenda, other than doing more of what I love, writing what is on my mind, and growing and expanding on my passion.
Thank you to anyone and everyone once again, who has been supportive, who has come across my blog, and made this opportunity so successful and enjoyable for me.
I hope to continuing producing content that is new, exciting and fresh, as I have many new exciting plans and projects planned for the future.

To my followers and readers, what kinds of post would you like to see from me in the new future? In what aspects, could I improve on my blog? What are your thoughts?
Let me know. I would love to hear from you guys!

xo,
Aichan Tewahade

Growing Pains: Liberate Me

Be the most genuine form of yourself. It’s liberating!

As difficult as it may be sometimes, as we are constantly changing and growing, being the person you are and feel at this very moment is something one must learn to do as we grow into different stages in our lives.

How you genuinely spend your days alone is no one’s business and does not dictate the person you are.

Being genuine means honesty, which is the ultimate form of kindness and genuinity. You will be surprised how much love will be in your life when you begin embracing every bone in your body, and begin being honest with the most important person in your life, yourself.

This genuine person is the real person behind all of your Instagram posts, and perceived outward images.

Who are you when you are all alone?

Who are you today? Who are you tomorrow? Will you be the same person? Will you be happy with yourself?

The amount of love and happiness that will come out of being genuine is incredible. Plus, feeling like you have no shame or anything to hide or lie about is a liberating aspect of unleashing your true self. Unlimited amounts of happiness and love is not hard to attain, if you are living for your own self, free of labels, or societal expectations. This should also bring a sense of stability within your life, as you will not be constantly changing who you are for others. And, any source of stability is a blessing in this world.

Finding yourself at any age and embracing the person you are at this current moment is a hard feat for anyone, including myself.

But what I have learned is that, if you stop basing your image of yourself based on what others are doing or what they think, and do what you truly want to be doing, you can find a genuine sense of self. This applies to any aspect of your life.

Living a life based on what you want others to think of you is toxic. Constantly spend more time embracing yourself and celebrating yourself.

Days may be long and challenging as you try to find out what you truly want in this world, but finding peace within yourself is one way to combat the chaos of our society.

I stand by the idea that anything you do with your friends, you should feel comfortable doing by yourself. Finding that genuine side of yourself will allow you to embrace the idea of independence, find a drive to live your life as you would like to, and allow you to comfortably spend time alone, rather than always in a group setting.

Completely isolating yourself is not the goal of finding yourself. You need to be able to find a balance between being with friends and company, and making time to spend time doing what you love.

You should love every aspect of your life, just as you should love every aspect of yourself.

Embrace your soul and be a soulful, passionate person that you were put on this world to be.

xo,

Aichan Tewahade